Week 4 AFC/NFC Recap
Gary Ashley
AFC Correspondent/Guy who owes his bookie a lot of money
Before I go off on a tangent,
1) I only got one game right this week. My bookie's gonna break my legs.
2) I nominate Jeff Garcia for Homecoming Queen.
Cleveland at Oakland - Oakland's new quarterback is going to become a household name to forget constantly here at the Hangover. Andy Walter put up List-like numbers, going 9/23 for 68 yds, 1 TD and 1 INT. Browns quarterback Charlie "#3 Combo" Frye usually puts up those numbers when not playing against JV teams, but had 3 TDs and 2 INTs, proving he's still not quite perfect. Randy Moss had a TD catch for Oakland. Who? Cleveland scores a charity win and next week plays Carolina, which might be the Panthers first charity win of the season. As for Oakland, good luck chasing Tampa Bay 2006 and/or 1986 for WORST. SEASON. EVER. AA Cleveland Sandlotters 24, Art Shell Senior High 21
San Diego at Baltimore - Baltimore has always been known for being a defensively-minded team. Then again, that's all they should put on the field and have Ray Lewis at QB knifing through defenders, pun and murder allegations intended. San Deimus Shockers QB Dr. Phil Rivers had his first NFL start and put on a good show going 13/22 for 145 yds, 1 TD and 1 INT. $6 Million QB Steve McNair had almost identical numbers, but it was the Ravens defense that got a hold and humped the Chargers into submission. Ed Reed's safety and Todd Heap,Heaphop,Heaphopanonymous's TD in the 4th put Baltimore in the W this week. E.A. Poe's Pros 17, Whale's Female Parts 14
New England at Cincinnati - Gary greatly apologizes to you the reader for thinking this game would be played in primetime. SportsIllusionrated has an adverse effect on the blog writers of the universe. Still, compared to the actual game that was played at the 8 pm slot, you probably would've wanted to watch this game instead of the 3rd quarter conversations and Mike Saddlebagging that occured with Madden. Tom Brady and the rest of the New England offense ran out of off days and came back to work with 2 passing TDs from Brady, 2 rushing TDs from running back Laurence Maroney and 1 rushing TD from Corey Dillon. Carson *Late Night with Conan O'Brien theme song* Palmer played more like Carson Daly, going 20/35 for 245 yds but with 2 lost fumbles and teen girl angst. Expect the Bengals and the Steelers to one day form an unholy Voltron to crush New England. Somehow the face of Bill Cowher on a 200 foot tall robot is hilarious. Tom Brady's Centerfold Wife 38, The Orange-Striped Jumpsuits 13
THE LIST (of QBs to throw under the bus)
Kerry Collins - 8/24 cups hit, 5 game dynasty (lost to the hot sorority girls), .012 BAC, passed out with his shoes on
Kurt Warner - 11/20 for 128 yds, 1 INT, 2 fumbles/1 lost, benched next week
Alex Smith - 13/25 for 92 yds, 2 INTs
Andrew Walter - 9/23 for 68 yds, 1 TD, 1 INT
Greg Reedy
NFC Correspondent/not a pick 6 winner
Arizona at Atlanta – The rare instance of two pick 6's in the same game. Arizona’s was not only a pick 6 but a coast-to-coast one at that and one so crazy the cameraman on Fox couldn’t believe his eyes that Arizona was scoring a touchdown. Kurt Warner got the start and in sheer amazement continued his sucktacular play as of late. Atlanta bounces back in a big way even with no big plays and their top wide receiver named Ashley. Atlanta 32, Arizona 10
Detroit at St. Louis – This may have been the most entertaining game of the day and yet NO ONE saw it unless you live in Detroit, St. Louis or one of those weird areas that showed the 4 p.m. regional game on Fox. St. Louis pulled out the win but at least the Lions showed they can score against someone. Marc Bulger continues to show Western PA pride. By the way, The Rams are tied with Seattle now. More on this in a moment. St. Louis 41, Detroit 34
Seattle at Chicago – The Madden curse continues on the Seattle Seahawks. This is becoming scary. Madden-related hijinx include:
- Losing in the Super Bowl with Madden on commentary
- Having Shawn Alexander randomly break his foot, Alexander on the cover of Madden
- Seattle gets creamed at Chicago again with Madden on commentary
- Madden and Mike Holmgren argue over Brett Favre and then go out to Outback after the game. (OK, I made that one up!)
Still, pretty sad state of affairs for that funny sounding Seattle city. The Bears weren’t so lovie-dovie with those Seahawks. Put that flag on your water tower. Chicago 34, Seattle 6
Fantasy Thrills and Spills:
As Always, I take a look at the week that was in fantasy football
Thrills: WR Reggie Williams of JAX, Santana Moss, Larry Johnson
Spills: Daunte Culpepper (Seriously, someone started him this week), JAX’s Defense, again anyone from Tennessee.
The fantasy team won again this week to go to 3-1. Next week, I play a team that is 4-0. Should be huge.
AFC Correspondent/Guy who owes his bookie a lot of money
Before I go off on a tangent,
1) I only got one game right this week. My bookie's gonna break my legs.
2) I nominate Jeff Garcia for Homecoming Queen.
Cleveland at Oakland - Oakland's new quarterback is going to become a household name to forget constantly here at the Hangover. Andy Walter put up List-like numbers, going 9/23 for 68 yds, 1 TD and 1 INT. Browns quarterback Charlie "#3 Combo" Frye usually puts up those numbers when not playing against JV teams, but had 3 TDs and 2 INTs, proving he's still not quite perfect. Randy Moss had a TD catch for Oakland. Who? Cleveland scores a charity win and next week plays Carolina, which might be the Panthers first charity win of the season. As for Oakland, good luck chasing Tampa Bay 2006 and/or 1986 for WORST. SEASON. EVER. AA Cleveland Sandlotters 24, Art Shell Senior High 21
San Diego at Baltimore - Baltimore has always been known for being a defensively-minded team. Then again, that's all they should put on the field and have Ray Lewis at QB knifing through defenders, pun and murder allegations intended. San Deimus Shockers QB Dr. Phil Rivers had his first NFL start and put on a good show going 13/22 for 145 yds, 1 TD and 1 INT. $6 Million QB Steve McNair had almost identical numbers, but it was the Ravens defense that got a hold and humped the Chargers into submission. Ed Reed's safety and Todd Heap,Heaphop,Heaphopanonymous's TD in the 4th put Baltimore in the W this week. E.A. Poe's Pros 17, Whale's Female Parts 14
New England at Cincinnati - Gary greatly apologizes to you the reader for thinking this game would be played in primetime. SportsIllusionrated has an adverse effect on the blog writers of the universe. Still, compared to the actual game that was played at the 8 pm slot, you probably would've wanted to watch this game instead of the 3rd quarter conversations and Mike Saddlebagging that occured with Madden. Tom Brady and the rest of the New England offense ran out of off days and came back to work with 2 passing TDs from Brady, 2 rushing TDs from running back Laurence Maroney and 1 rushing TD from Corey Dillon. Carson *Late Night with Conan O'Brien theme song* Palmer played more like Carson Daly, going 20/35 for 245 yds but with 2 lost fumbles and teen girl angst. Expect the Bengals and the Steelers to one day form an unholy Voltron to crush New England. Somehow the face of Bill Cowher on a 200 foot tall robot is hilarious. Tom Brady's Centerfold Wife 38, The Orange-Striped Jumpsuits 13
THE LIST (of QBs to throw under the bus)
Kerry Collins - 8/24 cups hit, 5 game dynasty (lost to the hot sorority girls), .012 BAC, passed out with his shoes on
Kurt Warner - 11/20 for 128 yds, 1 INT, 2 fumbles/1 lost, benched next week
Alex Smith - 13/25 for 92 yds, 2 INTs
Andrew Walter - 9/23 for 68 yds, 1 TD, 1 INT
Greg Reedy
NFC Correspondent/not a pick 6 winner
Arizona at Atlanta – The rare instance of two pick 6's in the same game. Arizona’s was not only a pick 6 but a coast-to-coast one at that and one so crazy the cameraman on Fox couldn’t believe his eyes that Arizona was scoring a touchdown. Kurt Warner got the start and in sheer amazement continued his sucktacular play as of late. Atlanta bounces back in a big way even with no big plays and their top wide receiver named Ashley. Atlanta 32, Arizona 10
Detroit at St. Louis – This may have been the most entertaining game of the day and yet NO ONE saw it unless you live in Detroit, St. Louis or one of those weird areas that showed the 4 p.m. regional game on Fox. St. Louis pulled out the win but at least the Lions showed they can score against someone. Marc Bulger continues to show Western PA pride. By the way, The Rams are tied with Seattle now. More on this in a moment. St. Louis 41, Detroit 34
Seattle at Chicago – The Madden curse continues on the Seattle Seahawks. This is becoming scary. Madden-related hijinx include:
- Losing in the Super Bowl with Madden on commentary
- Having Shawn Alexander randomly break his foot, Alexander on the cover of Madden
- Seattle gets creamed at Chicago again with Madden on commentary
- Madden and Mike Holmgren argue over Brett Favre and then go out to Outback after the game. (OK, I made that one up!)
Still, pretty sad state of affairs for that funny sounding Seattle city. The Bears weren’t so lovie-dovie with those Seahawks. Put that flag on your water tower. Chicago 34, Seattle 6
Fantasy Thrills and Spills:
As Always, I take a look at the week that was in fantasy football
Thrills: WR Reggie Williams of JAX, Santana Moss, Larry Johnson
Spills: Daunte Culpepper (Seriously, someone started him this week), JAX’s Defense, again anyone from Tennessee.
The fantasy team won again this week to go to 3-1. Next week, I play a team that is 4-0. Should be huge.
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